I just finished reading the book The Tell by Amy Griffin and was riveted by her courage to know and understand her own story and the self-compassion she cultivated to heal. Her memoir is an important reminder that we all only know parts of our story because our brains do not encode our full experience. It’s selective. And you recall even less. Here’s the rub – What you recall (and what your body stores) becomes the story that is running your life.

If you find that you’re feeling stuck, or perhaps in a place of emotional and/or physical pain, perhaps there is something in your story that you have not fully excavated or understood. In Amy’s case it was recalling and processing the traumatic experiences of childhood abuse that led to her healing. In my case, a recent traumatic experience opened the door to chronic pain and a commitment to understanding my full story, complete with the many traumas masked by the carefully crafted illusion of the “perfect” childhood.

The body does indeed keep score…. Amy found this to be true, and so have I. Like Amy, I’ve been very busy. I’ve created a beautiful life, checked all the boxes and have so much to be grateful for. And yet, my body knows this isn’t the full story. Until now, I haven’t slowed down for long enough to truly look inside.

I’m on a healing journey and perhaps more importantly, a journey to fully know and understand myself and my story. Being brutaly honest and peeling back the layers is of course challenging, but what is there to really be afraid of? I don’t know about you, but I’ve become much more afraid of dying without fully knowing who I am.

So, what are the parts of your story you’re afraid to look at?

Can you offer yourself the loving support and self-compassion you need to look inside, even for a just a few moments?

I hope so. It may be difficult, but it gets easier and I have no doubt you’ll benefit in ways you can’t yet imagine.

PS – Exciting news! If you’re in the midst of a midlife reinvention or planning for your unretirement journey, I can help. Check out my new site and offerings at wiserandfree.com.